Life Tips Daily

If you spend a lot of time on the computer, either at work or at home, you may find that you become stressed and disorganized when you can’t find files or documents that you’re looking for. The naming system you used made sense at the time, as did the location you saved it to, but now, for the life of you, you can’t recall what you were thinking (or what you were drinking!).

Here’s today’s tip to help you feel more in control of your clutter:

Clean both desktops
There is of course the physical desktop, where your computer keyboard and screen sit upon if you have a desktop computer. Some laptop owners sit at a desk at least occasionally, though that is perhaps not the general rule. Either way, make sure the surface on which your computer rests is clean: no post it notes mocking you with things you have to remember, no empty drink bottles, food plates, no stray pens and pencils everywhere. You may have to bring out some surface cleaner to clean your newly discovered (and likely dusty) surface.

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If, like me, you have a feeling that this year is going to be the best year of your life, try this exercise with me and review the past month. By reviewing the first month of the year, you may be able to see where your good intentions (also known as New Year’s resolutions) didn’t quite hold and how you can adjust them so that they will work better. What am I talking about? Well try the following and see if it helps you feel more in control of the new year.

Review your goals
If you made resolutions for the entire year, but find that nothing you did in January really contributed toward those goals, perhaps it’s time to consider making two lists: one of your overall goals for the year, and one that includes a breakdown of what you will do each month to work towards the greater goal. A good example is weight loss: if your goal is to lose 40 pounds by the end of the year, you may feel like it’s ok that you didn’t have much success in the first month because you have 11 more months to get on track. However, you may also discover that if you don’t give yourself a monthly goal related to weight loss, by the time November comes around, you will still have 40 pounds to lose! Instead, set monthly goals that are baby steps towards the big goal. For the weight loss example, this could involve walking 30 minutes a day, or planning to lose four pounds every month.

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If you live North America, particularly in one of the many states or provinces where snow is prevalent, it’s hard to make yourself leave the comfort of home when the cold weather arrives. However, if you’ve found that your plans to hibernate are wreaking havoc on your waistline, here are some things to consider to combat the weight gain.

Get souped up
A great way to fill your stomach without sacrificing too many calories, and ensure that you get your daily serving of vegetables is to make yourself a thick, hearty soup full of veggies and lean meat (unless you’re a vegetarian, of course!). Not only will this meal make you feel warm and cozy, it’ll satisfy the requirements for a healthy meal too.

Bundle up and go walking
Colour me guilty: I cheerfully use the winter weather to excuse my general physical inactivity but that’s a weak excuse. Why? Because the sidewalks around my place are cleared very regularly, and even when they’re not, long boots with a decent grip are all that is needed to ensure that a walk doesn’t turn into a slippery stroll. If you layer your clothing and have a good jacket, hat and gloves (or mittens), you’ll hardly feel the cold and return invigorated and warmed from your walk.

Try a winter sport
If walking sounds boring, why not try snowshoeing or cross country skiing? Neither requires any hard to learn skills and both will provide a very intense workout, even though you’re cruising along on flat ground for the most part. Depending on where you decide to go snowshoeing or cross country skiing, you may be able to rent the gear that you need before committing to it.

If you prefer sports that are more exciting, try downhill skiing, snowboarding or ice skating. These activities can be hard on those who are new to them so expect to build up your confidence (and skill) slowly.

For those of you living in chilly weather, how do you keep active?

Is anybody else suffering from the “Christmas is coming far faster that I want it to arrive” blues? Well instead of suffering, here are some ways to enjoying the fast approaching day. These tips are guaranteed to halt most, if not all cursing, and put you back in a cheery mood.

Take a day off
If you work somewhere where you can take a day, a half day or a couple of hours off, do it! If you’re worried that your shopping list will never shorten, spend this extra time shopping, if you’ve been shopping like a fiend and need a little extra shut-eye, sleep in, then hang out in your pyjamas all day (afternoon…rest of the day). The key is to do what will make you feel better at the end of the day. I’ve followed this and taken every other Friday off from my full time job so far in December and it’s been great shopping during less busy times.

Get a cold nose
If you’re lucky to live somewhere where the snowfall has been excessive so far, get out there and enjoy the snow! Snow is a hassle if you’re the one responsible for shoveling it, but nothing says winter like snowy days and if you live somewhere where it snows, you know how much better it is when you have a white Christmas. Go out and enjoy yourself in the snow: build a snowman to guard the house, make some snowballs or even do some snow painting. If your inner child is calling especially loudly, make a snow angel. When your nose starts running and your cheeks are red and you’ve lost sensation in your fingers and toes, it’s time to come in and warm up with hot chocolate or coffee.

Bake Therapy
When the smells of something delicious is coursing through your house, I dare you to be sad…unless you use so many bowls and utensils that the cleanup is staggering! If thoughts of baking make you think “more work I haven’t done!”, then bypass the mixing of ingredients and buy your dough ready made. Everyone knows the fun part is decorating the cookies anyway, followed closely by eating them.

It’s very easy during this season of giving to keep on giving to everyone but yourself. Give yourself permission now, not after the season is over, to do something that’s just for you and has you singing along with the Christmas carols in the mall the next time you have to venture there.

Yesterday’s tips will help you when you’re mailing your cards or packages, but do you need some help organizing Operation Christmas Card Write-up? I’m happy to help! Here is how to make the most of this repetitive but hopefully rewarding task.

Start early
If you give yourself plenty of time to write your cards, you will avoid feeling stressed and feeling put on the spot to come up with something suitable for each card. Hopefully by having a lot of time, ideas will be able to flow, and you will be in a good mood which will inspire positive thoughts and plenty of goodwill as you write the cards.

Get it together
As with any task, nothing is more irritating than having to get up every three minutes to grab yet another needed tool. To that end, make sure you have the following before sitting down to write your cards:

• plenty of cards and envelopes (including extras for mistakes!)
• nice pens that write well (you may want to use different and festive coloured pens too)
• scrap paper for testing pens, or for writing out practice messages
• water to seal the envelopes if you don’t like licking envelopes
• tape if you like to use that to seal envelopes
• correction fluid if needed
• a cleared off area with good lighting and comfortable seating.

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Do you ever get stuck on the phone with a friend who keeps talking and talking and talking? If your problem is the length of your telephone calls and not that you no longer want to speak with them, here are some tips to get off the phone with a chatty friend minutes faster!

Set a time limit on the conversation and inform your chatty friend of it
You don’t need to start the conversation with “I have a stopwatch and once 10 minutes have passed my phone will automatically hang up” but you can let your friend know ahead of time that you really only have 5 minutes to talk. You may be uncomfortable setting a time limit on the conversation, especially if you’re the one who called, but the fact that you called means you want to keep in contact with and talk to your friend, and that is what your friend should focus on.

Listen more
If you’re stuck on how to be a good listener, read this. If you allow your friend to do most of the talking during the conversation, when the conversation ends, he or she will likely feel that it was a good (albeit short!) conversation, compared with if the talk is dominated by you and then cut off by you. If your call is purely to catch up, allow your friend to spend more time talking about what has been going on in her life (you probably won’t have to twist her arm to get it out of her!). Ask questions but let the majority of the talking come from your friend.

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If you have ever poured your heart out to a listening ear, only to look up and see that your confidant is otherwise occupied—sending a text message, watching television or actually talking on the phone to somebody else, you have felt the hurt of talking to someone who wasn’t listening to you, and it’s not a good feeling.

When we talk, we like to think people are listening, especially if we’re sharing something that makes us feel vulnerable. Good listeners are perceived as friendly people, the sort of person that people want to befriend. How can you make sure when it’s your turn to listen, you give it your all?

Make a decision to pay attention
This is simple enough: if someone comes to you and asks if you have a minute for them to run something by you, or if an upset friend asks if the two of you can talk, if you decide to say yes, a good listener will realize that they are also making a decision to give that person their full attention. If it’s not a good time for you to listen, don’t say yes—you will only shortchange the person coming to you, and they don’t deserve that.

Eliminate all other distractions
Once the decision has been made to be a listener, you should physically turn to the person and turn off or silence any gadgets that might cause a distraction or intrude in your conversation, including beepers, telephones, and computers. If you need to excuse yourself from other people or your children, do this too. Find yourself a quiet place (or create one) where you will be able to pay attention. Even if you are not speaking face to face with someone, and they have no way of knowing who is in the room with you, it is a good practice to remove distractions and force yourself to focus on the speaker alone.

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Good morning!

It’s been a while but work has been kicking my butt-both jobs as a matter in fact. It makes me wonder how those people who start a business that eventually moves to being their primary gig manage do it. You know who I’m talking about: the person who works at her full time 40 hours a week desk job, while doing web design on the side at nights and on the weekend, or the person who combines a full time job with a part time job, making their work week 60 hours a week-or more.

Although I have two jobs (Full time job + part time job of 12-15 hours a week), there are people who manage to fit much more into their weeks. How do they do it? I don’t know for certain but here are some helpful tips for those of you who are considering taking on a second job.

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Christmas is just around the corner (don’t be fooled by that month called November: it will be over before you know it). It is pretty amazing how many events get crammed into the final month of the year—parties, potlucks, dinners, gift exchanges, numerous shopping trips to buy the perfect gift, get togethers with friends and family that you don’t seem to have the opportunity (or inclination) to socialize with the rest of the year. If you’re anything like me (and I hope you’re not), you probably start thinking about Christmas in October, then do nothing until December 9 or 10, and then feel like you’re in a losing race for the rest of the month. Your plans to host a party or dinner have to be abandoned because you just don’t have enough time. You may also end up double booking yourself or booking yourself for four parties in five nights which, when you’re not 19 anymore, is hard on your body.

I’ll be sharing a few tips to help you have a more enjoyable Christmas season today and tomorrow. Today’s tip is:

Start early
A friend of mine swears that you can never start planning too early for Christmas and I used to scoff at this. I’ve realized that it’s true: from buying decorations, gift wrap and other supplies (disposable plates, cutlery, napkins, etc) during the Boxing day or post-Christmas sales to asking family members for their wishlists at the end of the summer (or earlier!), the more time you give yourself to get ready, the more money you’ll save because you’ll actually be able to buy gifts when they go on sale rather than during the times where the demand is largest, meaning that not only are things more expensive, but the quantities are limited). Starting early means that you can afford to take the time to buy gifts that you’re confident that the recipient will like, because you’re not panicking and picking up the first thing that comes into your field of vision. You may even discover that you enjoy shopping, since it’s the unhurried leisurely variety, rather than the scenario of struggling to get through a crowded mall. The available selection is also larger earlier on in the season, so the chances of you getting exactly what you wanted to buy are much higher.

Tomorrow we’ll look at how to organize all the events you are involved in during the holiday season.

If you live in Canada or can get your hands on September’s issue of Glow magazine, do it! Why? Because this issue includes a great article entitled 20 ways to live longer.

The magazine explains each point in detail but here are my five favourite tips from the article:

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Is your procrastination getting on your nerves yet? If not, I bet someone in your life has had it with your ability to put things off indefinitely. Yesterday we attempted to understand why people put things off so easily, today, let’s look at how to turn these reasons into starting points to becoming a ‘doer’.

(For descriptions of the following “problems”, see yesterday’s entry)

Problem: The Perfectionist’s Curse

Solution: Why is the quest for perfectionism called a curse? Because in some cases, perfectionism is simply not necessary! Yes, you should try your best but keep in mind that you can only do your best with what you have. So, in yesterday’s example of the rip in a piece of clothing, let’s say a grey pair of pants, choose the closest colour of thread you have (an exact match is not necessary) and stitch them up! In all other areas, look at the problem, look at your resources, and using what you have, do your best. Rest assured, in only very rare cases will your absolute best not be enough.

Lesson: make the limits of perfection the resources you have at hand. Sure, if you had a ten thousand dollar budget, you could probably do a better renovation job on the bathroom, but using the resources you have to replace the sink, add a fresh coat of paint, or redo the curtains is also a success.

Problem: Laziness

Solution: Nike has had much success with the “Just do it” slogan so why not apply it to getting over laziness. Just (get up and) do it! If you are a longtime procrastinator, you are well aware that putting things off doesn’t make them go away. So get going and save the resting for after the job is done.

Lesson: laziness breeds more laziness, or it leads to panic as you end up not having enough time to accomplish your important goals. Your time is precious; don’t let laziness rob you of it.

Problem: It’s just a temporary delay

Solution: If your temporary delays are never that, you can’t afford to give yourself that time. If you truly don’t know how a short delay ends up being months, set a timer for short time periods (five minutes, 30 minutes, two hours). When the timer goes off, you must get to work. You may also find it useful to break the task down into small elements that you can do and then take a break before moving on to the next element, allowing you to put things off–but not indefinitely.

Lesson: If you start things right away, and stop allowing yourself ‘temporary’ delays, you will get things done. Your rest will be that much sweeter as you’ve earned it due to your hard work.

Problem: Fear (of failure)

Solution: The best way to get over a fear of failure is to fail! You will be shocked to realize that there is life after failure, and this life can sometimes be even better than before. “Show me someone who has never failed and I will show you somebody who has never tried” a saying goes and there is a reason for that. Failure is a part of life. The act of failing always teaches you (and sometimes others) a lesson or two (whether these lessons are learned is another thing), and some are able to use the lessons learned to lead them in an entirely different direction, one that leads to success. Putting off doing something then, can be like delaying reaching your full potential: you never know where your next success or failure will lead you.

Lesson: Fear of failure could very well be a fear of reaching your full potential.

Lest you think you are getting tips from a reformed procrastinator, tomorrow I will horrify you with my own to do list that I will need to apply these very principles to!

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I went camping two weekends ago, and although we were well organized and had everything we absolutely needed, I thought of a few tips and tricks that would make camping even better:

Water jug
If you are camping on well established camping grounds that are provincially (state) regulated, you may have access to running water on the camp grounds. In Ontario, this water is perfectly fine for cooking with, brushing teeth and washing hands (and drinking too, although most bring their own water for that). Instead of shuffling over to the water pump every time you need to wash your hands, buy yourself a water jug that will hold several litres of water so you can minimize the number of trips you need to make.

Extra rope
If you enjoy going to the beach and swimming, or will be taking showers in the morning, you will likely have a soggy towel and/or suit that needs to be hung to dry. You can certainly use a tree branch to air your things but a rope strung between two trees would be a far neater solution.

Fire making 101
Making a fire may come easily to you but if it doesn’t, you should read up on how to create a roaring fire. Another way to help the fire making process is by collecting kindling (small pieces of wood used to keep the fire going) around your campsite, perhaps before setting up your tent. Provincial parks sell firewood but if you happen to have access to free wood at home or on the way to the camp site, you may want to take advantage of that as it will cut down on the expense.

Double duty items for meals
When planning meals, think of how some ingredients can be used for another meal: the bread used to make toast for breakfast could be wrapped around hotdogs, the hotdogs from lunch can be chopped up into the salad for dinner. If being economical is important, you can limit the number of food items you bring in order to ensure that each gets maximized (and hopefully used up!).

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It’s Sunday evening, and you’ve invited friends over for dinner. They have young children, so you assume that it’ll be an early evening because there are children with bedtimes that should be enforced. Or, you have dinner with friends who are (also) professionals, and assume your 8-4 or 9-5 job schedules automatically dictate that people will be leaving soon after dessert. Sadly, you’re wrong. Here are some tips for dealing with guests that overstay their welcome.

Ask them to leave (politely)
There’s nothing wrong in letting your guests know (apologetically if that makes you feel better) that unfortunately you have an early morning and will have to “kick them out”. Said with a sense of humour and a lack of annoyance in your voice, this approach is best as it allows your guest to know why they are being asked to leave, and they may derive some small thrill from feeling like they are doing you a favour.

Pretend it’s your fault
Something along the lines of “I’m so sorry, look how long I’ve kept you with my chatting!” allows them to feel that they are not being kicked out but rather allowed to escape. This little white lie usually works…unless your guest is well aware that they have been having a monologue and you have only been nodding when appropriate. In that case they may become insulted so use this approach sparingly.

Hint by action subtly
This can be a very time consuming effort, especially if your guest is rather clueless. You may want to try stifling yawns, tidying discreetly yet visibly, and, if you have children, you can ask them to go and start getting ready for bed. You could also ask them when they go to bed, what they have planned for the following day, what time it is, in an effort to get them to be aware of their surroundings.

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If you are right in the midst of your vacationing, or will be going on vacation soon, you may find these tips on packing light handy!

Pack double duty items
There are lots of ways to incorporate double duty items: you can pack something that you will wear more than once, such as a pair of jeans, or you can pack items that are a bit more versatile: a button down shirt can be worn as a jacket one day, then tucked in as a blouse the next. You can also pack items of clothing that are convertible, such as a pair of pants that zips off into shorts and/or capri pants, shirts that roll up and button so you can wear it as a long sleeve or short sleeved shirt, a jacket that is water resistant and can serve as a raincoat if needed. Try not to pack anything unless it will serve you more than once.

Know the weather where you’re headed
Check the weather forecast in order to ensure you have what you need. This will prevent you from bringing several outfits for each day just because you don’t know what to expect weather-wise.

Know what you’re wearing when
By planning what you will wear each day, you may notice while packing that you’re packing too much or that some items can do double duty. Taking the time to plan outfits might seem tedious at first, but it will be a space saver later.

Know what is supplied at your destination
If you are staying at a hotel, you don’t need to bring your own towels and there is usually a complimentary hair dryer and iron in your hotel room. Don’t waste space packing these items! If in doubt, you can always call ahead to see what amenities come with your hotel room. If you are staying with friends, the chances that they will have a lot of the appliances you may need are even greater.

Take a larger suitcase!
This is an absolute last resort: if you see that you just can’t pack light, grab a larger suitcase and bask in all the extra room you now have! That doesn’t mean you can add more items to your case though!

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Yesterday, I explained how frustrating seeking a lost item can be. Today I’d like to share some tips to make finding things more bearable:

Retrace your steps
This is the step that most people do the moment they realize they have lost something: they think back to where they last saw the item, and check all of those places and see if the item can be recovered along the way. Sometimes it can be helpful to mentally retrace one’s steps before physically retracing them as this gives you a chance to map out an entire route instead of jumping from place to place.

Recruit help
If during the previous step you discover that you covered a large area of space before you lost the item, it may be necessary to seek the help of others. Letting people know what you’re looking for can be helpful in several ways: it may help the job get done faster (the whole “two heads are better than one” argument) and someone may have already found the item you seek and by you consulting them they can hand over an item whose owner they were uncertain of. Also, a helper can ask questions that help to trigger your memory as you try to retrace your steps.

Check each area thoroughly before moving on
Leave no stone unturned and no envelope unopened when you’re seeking something! If you are looking for something on your desk, go through each drawer one by one. Remove everything and look in pockets, nooks and any other crannies before moving on to the next. This is such an important step because going through an area swiftly without checking everything carefully guarantees that you will need to recheck the place, which wastes time and gives the frustration an opportunity to mount.

Give yourself time
Although most searches are somewhat urgent, it is important to give yourself time for this process. By taking the time to think carefully as you retrace your steps and check each possible area, your chances of finding the item are greater. If you feel rushed, you may not see things are right in front of you. Take the time to be thorough.

These are tips that have helped me in the past, what is your searching style?

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